MEN AND (WO)MEN: Part II

"lastly guys, dont explore other girls if you're already in deep exploration with another girl. you'll only be a heartbreaker."

Alamak! This one... I disagree. Girls, have you ever considered what are the different reasons? What if the brother is praying, and seeking God, and as best as he knows how, he is trying to find out who is the best sister in terms of character?

Of course, maybe there are other reasons. But I think we cannot have such a flat judgement of this without understanding the heart first and foremost.

In fact, about the point of heartbreaking, personally, I cannot stand it when a girl gives out mixed signals. We guys appreciate straightforward talk, given in true sincerity and honesty. Let your yes be yes, and your no, no! As Proverbs says, "An honest answer is like a kiss on the lips." Ladies, please respect men's feelings and don't waste their time + discourage them! That is just plain selfish.

I've seen so many girls who don't know how to say directly no... they're very nice, but do not know how to say it well. As a result, they leave the guy feeling cheated / played out. And for those who are direct, it seems to me that a lot of them are not sensitive. Why should this be so? Is this what Jesus wants?

I know of a few, a VERY few, sisters in church (I think only a couple of them) who, if a bro were to express interest in them but they're not interested, would say no in a caring way, and with the heart to help the bro be all he can be in Christ... such that the bro wld go away feeling even more refreshed and encouraged! Ironic? No! Not when you want to be a Christian. "Let your conversation be always full of grace, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone." But it seems to me that we more often than not take that salt and rub it into people's wounds.

I am speaking from the viewpoint of discipleship here. Don't regard others from a worldly viewpoint anymore. See from the viewpoint of Christ, can or not? Or the world will see no difference between you and the non-Christian girl. (I think I raised this point before in a certain Facebook post.)

There's this dear friend who said that if a guy were to express interest in her, but she wasnt' interested, she would feel put off and avoid the guy. The thing is, she knows that this attitude isn't biblical. But she didn't think much about changing her attitude here. And she's a good sister (in character) some more!

So it made me think. How serious are you about being Christlike, even in the way you say no? How serious are you about letting the Word of God override your feelings? Ladies, you want men who are not emotionally unstable. Right. We men like women who are also emotionally stable and honour the Word of God above their feelings... in fact, who let the Word of God DRIVE their feelings.

I think, at the core of it all, this is no longer abt bros or sisters, male or female. It is simply about whether you want to be a disciple or not. Think about it. Because ultimately, even in our relationships - or our rejection of relationships, we are called to be Christlike. Because... we are all sons of God, regardless of our gender.

Galatians 3:26-29

"You are all sons of God through faith in Christ Jesus, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ. There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise."